A moment in time
Through these past months I have gone through heavy shit. I have experienced an onslaught of depression, anxiety, and fear. Through this fear I have learned a lot about myself. At one time I would have lost it. I would have given up. But now I am approaching life with a new clarity. My life is strong. I am going places and I feel ready. I’m studying Chinese again, and I’m reading the tao te ching. In the past I got caught up in semantics, logic, and academic pedagogy. Now, I am interested in experience. Before I was interested in escape. Escape is an interesting topic and its one I don’t really want to delve into at the current moment. Experience fascinates me because its such a touchy subject to so many. As a traveler I realize that my experiences are unique, that I am seeing the world from a unique perspective. As a teacher I believe I am being challenged in a unique way. This also stems into experience but it feels a little cloudy at the moment. Right now I’m dating a really fun girl and its added a whole ebullience to my feelings on life. I’m listening to a lot more jazz and less indie rock lately. I’m also going back to the classic things I liked and delving away from the pretentions I hung upon in college. Things are all clashing right now and I’m unsure of where they’ll go, but I do know that things are definitely looking up, way up towards something that gets me very excited.
2 years ago